Al Gore picked this email for you

Lauren was on her phone sending colored ants after pixels when she looked over and caught her husband crying laughing at his screen.

Oct 20 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

1

"I truly wish I had your forehead"

Lauren posted a selfie on LinkedIn to explain that her Gryffindor sweatshirt matches her color season, even though she is not a Gryffindor.

Oct 6 • Lauren Aquilino and Sydney Mulligan

1

September 2026

Audrey Harze sat in our hosting chairs and lived to tell about it

We told Audrey Harze she’d get to guest-host with us ahead of MOPZA, this year’s marketing ops event going fully virtual in October.

Sep 22 • Lauren Aquilino and Sydney Mulligan

1

I told my daughter I hope she hates horseback riding

Lauren’s in-laws bought her youngest horseback riding lessons for her birthday.

Sep 9 • Lauren Aquilino and Sydney Mulligan

1

August 2026

His team is called AI BS and no one thought it through

Josh walked past the EMMIE Collective tattoo booth at a work conference, looked down at his own calf, and decided that was the moment.

Aug 12 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

1

July 2026

We gave Ethan a promotion and a trash verdict in the same episode

Three minutes into this episode, Lauren stops the bit entirely and says: “I would like to officially announce Ethan in his new transition and new role…

Jul 31 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

1

Alexander got fired from two sales jobs. Then he built a career on saying so.

Alexander DeMoulin walked in ready to talk ICPs and pick-list values.

Jul 15 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

1

Verdict: not holistically trash (but it's close)

Sydney got triple-called.

Jul 3 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

2

June 2026

We Had to Cancel Our Work Trip Because of a Cartel. So We Went to Medieval Times.

The annual EMMIE consultant retreat was supposed to be Playa del Carmen.

Jun 17 • Lauren Aquilino and Sydney Mulligan

1

AI Is Posting Bounties and We Are the Meatspace

The robots are now our bosses

Jun 4 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

1

May 2026

We Got Posted on LinkedIn Lunatics. One of Us Took It Well.

We Made LinkedIn Lunatics.

May 20 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

2

My 4-year-old met the mayor. She thought he made the snow.

Season four of Pretty Funny Business is here.

May 5 • Sydney Mulligan and Lauren Aquilino

1